A dear collegue, Penny, and I will be teaching our first workshop together, entitled 'Be Your Self'. And it focuses on just that: being your self.

Leaning on the principles that underpin the Zero Balancing work, we will look at what it means to be your self and practical ways in which this can be achieved. These principles are universal and can be applied to anyone and everyone. So our aim is to teach how you can apply this to your life - so you can be your self, no matter what!

Being our first workshop, we will be offering this at the discounted price of £30 per person and we will ask for your feedback so that we can learn and improve on future events.

​It will take place at EH1 Therapies on Saturday 12th March, from 10am to 1pm. All our welcome to join but spaces are limited so please secure your place when you can. See here for more details and to secure your place.

Hope to see you there 😊

From Wednesday 21st July, all sessions will be held at EH1 Therapies. It's near John Lewis/Real Foods and really easy to get to!

The full address is:
EH1 Therapies
28 Forth Street
Edinburgh
EH1 3LH

Look forward to seeing you there :)​

This may seem a little off topic to some but I'd like to take some time to let you know about what's been keeping me busy in recent times.

I had a brief text conversation some months ago with someone who had left WhatsApp because of changes to their privacy policy. I didn't give that conversation any further thought until later that evening when I felt something ignite within me. In that moment I was inspired to delve back into the world of online privacy and computer security that I had left well over a decade ago. 

The next morning I started doing my research. Catching up on 15+ years of development in the tech world was not easy - and I'm still researching to this day - but one thing was abundantly clear almost immediately. I had been totally unaware of my boundaries in the electronic world.

I learnt about my 'digital footprint' and all the means that the big tech companies use at their disposal to find out as much about you as they can. Subjects such as browser fingerprinting and metadata became recurring themes, and the fact that our mobile phones are used to gather data about us.

The world's biggest internet companies use our over-reliance on their free products to their own advantage. Data is sold, analysed and in some cases this is used to manipulate the political future of whole countries. In other cases, poor security means that personal data is leaked and various online accounts around the world are hacked. I was loosely aware of all of this, yet I wasn't aware of the technologies these companies implemented to achieve this nor the scale on which it happens.

I felt uncomfortable. I had been totally unaware that my boundaries had been breached. It's one thing using my information in this way, it's another thing to do it without my explicit consent. So I was spurred into action to remedy my engagement with the online world. Naturally, part of that includes this very website.

I am duty bound by law to protect my clients' files and these will soon be moved to a more secure cloud service (farewell Dropbox). The same data protection law also includes all correspondence which has for several years been managed by Google (sayonara!). Going forward, I will instead use an encrypted email service for all client emails and appointment records.

And further still, I will strip Google Analytics from this website and all embedded Facebook like and share buttons - all of which are used to track you around the internet whether you have a Google/Facebook account or not.

The principles of Zero Balancing include respecting a client's boundaries and holding them in the highest personal regard. I cannot in good conscience allow Google to scan the emails that are sent to me for content and log who emails me, when and where from. I cannot turn a blind eye to my client's files being on an insecure cloud service which can, in theory, be accessed by others. Neither can I allow people who visit my website in good faith be tracked by Google and Facebook.

I can't escape the reality of the world we live in. Nonetheless I am responsible for what I can control.

My privacy policy has been updated to reflect changes already made, and further changes are still in the works.

P.S. For anyone curious about where to start, I would suggest downloading Jumbo on your phone (you can press 'skip' on all the paid-for features) and doing an assessment of your online accounts. If you want to take it further still, check out the In Cognito course on Techlore's youtube channel. I'm not affiliated with either Jumbo or Techlore, other than that I am indebted to them for helping me out on this learning journey.

​I've had the pleasure of seeing a certain client most weeks throughout this second lockdown for 'virtual ZBs' over Zoom. I share this story with their permission.

During a recent session, the client mentioned that one of his close friends was in hospital after a serious heart attack. He was devastated. The hospital staff performed open heart surgery on his friend multiple times, blood oxygen levels were low and there were signs that the friend's organs were really struggling. The family had been called to come to the hospital to bid farewell. This session was one where a deep grief loomed large.

During the framing, the client verbally expressed, and at the same time dismissed, the notion that we could offer the session for his friend, and then went onto describing what he himself needed. He was feeling powerless because he was unable to visit due to the pandemic, let alone help his friend's struggling wife and family. He was visibly shaken and upset. I offered that we tend to all those things: offer the session for his friend, address his powerlessness and balance his emotional state.

And so began my first ever virtual ZB by proxy. The client received the session on behalf of his friend who lay in hospital - someone I had never met, yet I knew because of my client's close relationship with him that it would work. And, now that I think about it, at the same time it would naturally address the client's feelings of powerlessness and dread. He now had utility and agency in the otherwise helpless situation he found himself in.

I invited the client to first become grounded in his body, by focusing on his breath and then on the weight of his body on the couch. When there was a certain level of quietude, I invited the client to bring into his mind's eye his good friend. Happy, vibrant memories were encouraged. Then, verbally stating that this session was for his friend, I went about doing a virtual ZB. 

Working on someone who has recently had such major physical traumas and is in such a state of physical deterioration had a very different feel to it. I could sense it in my hands as we worked - the heart bleeds, the trauma to the chest, the fear of death.

At the end of the session, I recommended the client disconnect from his friend and drop all imagery from his mind's eye. When he came to and sat up, his countenance was very different. He glowed, smiled, and expressed his gratitude for the session. He left feeling empowered to take action and try some remote healing work on his friend.

The following week I learnt that the friend was doing better, with a long road to recovery ahead. The sedatives for the induced coma had been stopped some five days beforehand and there was a slow return to the waking world. To cut this a little short, suffice to say we did another session by proxy, this time focusing on the liver and the nervous system. And more specifically, on purification (liver) and light (central nervous system).

I felt inspired to share this account with the ZB community for two reasons... Well, maybe just one, really. I wanted to share that it's become increasingly clear to me how often clients limit themselves. This client did so by dismissing the idea what we could gift the session to his friend. The way I see it, a huge part of the role of the therapist is to empower the client. Had I done a session like this before? No. Did that stop me from offering it? No. And that's where the (sort of) second reason comes in. How often do we limit ourselves as practitioners?

My inspiration in this regard comes from Fritz in 'Alchemy of Touch'. In the book, Fritz dowses the age of a trauma, facilitates ancestral healing, works directly with the Water Official. He even expresses disappointment at not getting to the root of a client's Crohn's disease. At no point does he dismiss a client's frame, no matter how audacious or seemingly out of reach it may be. And neither does he limit himself. His is an example for us to follow.

Doing a ZB by proxy in this way has changed my perspective not so much of what is possible - although it did that a little - but more of myself. If I am to empower my clients, what use is it if I disempower myself? If a client wants to go somewhere in a session that is not familiar territory to me, who is to say that it's not possible? That's not going to be me. I'll continue to get out of my own way, so the client can get what they need.

Before tackling this question, I'd like to first make it clear that every Zero Balancing session is different. Whilst what the therapist may do during the session may be more or less the same, the client's experiences and the outcomes are rarely - if ever - the same.

This is mostly because the client is different every time. I'm pretty sure that you the reader are aware that your feelings and mood changes from day to day and moment to moment. It is in this sense that the client is different. And, as a a result, how the client feels after each Zero Balancing session will differ depending on what's going on for them in their lives at the time they receive their session. The same is also true for the therapist. And it's the meeting of these two individuals that determines the client's experience and outcome of the session.

There are, however, some general themes.

So what does Zero Balancing (ZB) feel like?

ZB feels safe - first and foremost Zero Balancing creates a feeling of safety. There's a specific way that this is trained and cultivated, and it really is what allows the client to relax. Without safety, deep relaxation is impossible. It's also hugely important that those who have had their boundaries breached through touch (physical and sexual abuse, in particular) are able to experience touch that does not want anything from them and remains non-judgemental and compassionate. For such individuals this type of touch can be profoundly healing.

ZB is gentle - From the outside ZB looks like a series of gentle stretches and holds performed on the clients body. There are no abrupt motions or forceful manipulation. Zero Balancing practitioners work in co-operation with the body. If anything hurts it is to the detriment of the recipient, the therapist and the working relationship between the two. So we work gently. Indeed, I actively encourage my clients to tell me if something doesn't feel good or hurt good (as opposed to hurt bad). I will always respect their wishes and adjust my touch accordingly.

ZB is relaxing - with the sense of safety and the gentle touch, it's all too easy to feel at peace and to relax. Clients often relax so deeply that they lose track of time. Some report that although they didn't sleep, they saw dream imagery or experienced those pre-sleep twitches.

ZB feels good - it's no secret in the ZB community that it feels good to receive. In fact, I've been on the receiving end of sessions that feel just so fantastic words fail to come anywhere near the experience of it. Sometimes though, a spot can feel tender or sore, but in a good way. If it ever really hurts then voice this to the practitioner, rather than grin and bare it.

ZB demonstrates the unity of the body - during a session a client may experience, for example, when working on their foot they get a sensation in their neck. Such phenomena which demonstrate the interconnectedness of the body are relatively common. Indeed, one can even experience how a certain old memory or emotion is stored in a particular location!
 
ZB can give insights - Insights happen. Sometimes this is to do with the client's past and at other times it's to do with the present. For example, memories can come to the surface of conscious awareness in such a way that it's seen in a new light, or creative solutions can be found for current projects or   problems.

ZB can stir emotions - Positive and negative emotions can come to the surface unexpectedly during the sessions. When the client feels safe and deeply relaxed, emotions can rise to the surface without much warning. This is a good thing. Often these are unacknowledged or unprocessed emotions and once they run their course then the client feels much better after.



And how will you feel afterwards?

Relaxed - the most common outcome is that the client feels very relaxed after. Their tensions have eased and they feel more comfortable in their skin.

Taller - perhaps the second most common outcome is that the client gets up and says they feel taller! The therapist focuses on easing tensions and reducing any sense of stagnation in the body, and to do this we often introduce a sense of length - especially to the spine and hips. Presumably this is what makes the clients feel taller. In some cases, they look it too :)

Lighter - our tensions can really weigh us down, whether those tensions are physical, emotional or mental doesn't matter. The sense of lightness arises when those tensions are eased, especially the emotional ones. Clients who experience this always walk out of their sessions very different to how they came in!

Re-energised - holding onto tensions takes a lot of energy, so as they ease you can feel so much more energised. Also, some clients who enter very deep states of relaxation often get up feeling as though they've just woken up from a very refreshing and nourishing sleep. They bounce off the couch and feel ready to take on whatever life throws at them.

Tired - it's undeniable that some people feel quite tired after the session. In some cases, this may be because they've been tired for a long time and have used stimulants, such as caffeine, to keep them going. ZB therefore gets them back in touch with themselves, so they can experience how tired they truly are. Other instances this happens include if the ZB is later on in the day - during an evening session, for example - or after a bad night's sleep and the post-ZB tiredness is therefore natural. More rarely, this occurs when there has been a big outpouring of emotion and the client is left somewhat drained from the experience. This is usually short lived, and the client bounces back stronger.

Reduced pain - stiff backs, aching joints, headaches, digestive problems - these can all ease considerably during the session. Clients often only notice it when they start to move around again.

Resolution - this is related to when the client receives insights or has a cathartic emotional experience during the session (they can happen after the session too!). Old emotional wounds that have been left untended can finally heal and that chapter in your life can finally be put to rest. The sense of resolution and relief this brings is a real gift.


These are some of the most common experiences during a Zero Balancing session and immediately after. The changes that can happen in someone's life as a result of receiving regular Zero Balancing sessions is something I'll talk about in a future blog post. And there are of course other experiences and outcomes, so the above list is by no means complete - just the most commonplace.

What do you think? Does Zero Balancing sound like something you might benefit from or enjoy? If so, then get in touch to arrange an appointment in Edinburgh or find a ZBer near you.

It almost goes without saying that the coronavirus lockdown has a far reaching impact across many levels of society. As a therapist, I was able to start seeing clients again in late July, meaning I had a four month break since lockdown was first introduced. What I have seen in my clients since starting up again is not something I could have predicted. The impacts vary from client to client, however, one thing is for sure: not one of them was left unscathed.

Looking solely at how lockdown has impacted individuals on emotional and mental wellbeing, there are three general themes that I have noticed in my clients. Sometimes a client will present with just one of these being prominent, others have had a mixture.

1. Stagnation
Some were stuck in small tenement flats, others had a bit more room and their own gardens. Outdoor access was severely limited to all in the early stages and this continued for those who were shielding for so much longer. You may have been furloughed for some weeks or months, with all routine and structure taken away. For many of us, our lives as we knew them were either on hold or completely cancelled.

Left at home for long periods of time, potentially with very little to keep them satisfactorily occupied, a sense of stagnation crept in. This stagnation is not just due to the more sedentary lifestyle that occurred. Much of the activity, buzz and vitality in life was halted. Depressions set in. Comfort food was consumed. Old habits that were kept at bay reignited. In many ways, life became stale and stuck, with little hope and plenty of uncertainty.

2. Amplification
Whether stuck at home with their significant others, their families or in complete physical isolation - or even working in the intensive care unit - amplification of discord is the second clear theme.

Relationship difficulties came to the surface. Grief, long left unprocessed, found room to bubble up. Dissatisfaction with a living arrangement, family dynamic or career direction could no longer be ignored. All these issues were given room and amplified - often in a very unwelcome and traumatic manner.

3. Clarification
This theme often links in with amplification, but not always. The opportunity to reflect on one's life was not missed by people who experience clarifications. The clarification could be to do with how they spend their time, who they spend their time with or a honing of their individual sense of purpose and meaning.

***

What has struck me is that all three of these themes are things that Zero Balancing can help with. In correspondence with one of my teachers recently, he said the following:

"ZB [Zero Balancing] is an ideal therapy for anybody emerging from the restrictions of lockdown or who are left feeling ‘out of touch’, disconnected from life or unsettled in themselves. I’ve also been impressed by its ability to aid the larger healing of clients coming out of mental health crises, particularly where medication has tried to control them but not really ‘touched’ the nature of their disturbance."

I got a shiver of recognition when I first read that, and it still rings true now. If you are interested in seeing if Zero Balancing can help you in these uncertain times, please get in touch.

I am delighted to inform you that I will re-open my Zero Balancing practice from Wednesday 5th August.

There have been lots of changes, not least because of the pandemic, so there's plenty to tell you about. I've done my best to keep this email as informative as possible and as short as possible. So without further ado, here goes:


1. New location

After two year's of working at Santosa it was time for a change. I made the decision earlier this year to move my practice and I can now confirm that I have secured a new location at 10a Rutland Square, right in the heart of Edinburgh's West End. This is where I will be operating from from Wednesday 5th August.

I share the space with Pointe Ahead Pilates, Reid Reiki and The Yoga Transformative - although I now have my very own room :) The room may be a little bare in the first few months, so please be patient while I try to make the room more comfortable for us all.

2. New opening hours

My opening hours have changed slightly since the move. As follows:

     Wednesdays 12pm - 5.30pm
     Thursdays 10am - 8.30pm
     Fridays 10am - 5.30pm
     Saturdays 10am - 1.00pm


3. New pricing structure

Short appointments have been introduced to allow people who work nearby to experience Zero Balancing during their lunchbreaks. I have also introduced a new offer for those who dedicate themselves to 3 sessions at a time - payment is required upfront in these instances.

     £25 for a short appointment (normally 25-30 minutes*)
     £45 for a regular appointment (50-60 minutes*)
     £120 for 3 x regular appointments

     £30 for a distance session (more on this below)

* These are non-pandemic timings. During the pandemic, consultations will be done before the appointment to reduce time spent meeting in person as per Scottish Government guidance. Short sessions will be limited to 20 minutes and regular sessions to 45 minutes.


4. Distance sessions

I offered distance sessions to my clients during lockdown and some of my clients have found these to be really helpful. I have therefore decided to make this a permanent offering. During the coronavirus pandemic, these sessions are available by donation... Thereafter, they will cost £30 per session. More information about these sessions can be found here.


5. Gift cards

Electronic gift cards are now available for regular and distance appointments. I'm working on getting some paper gift cards designed and these will be ready before the end of August.


6. Coronavirus pandemic - what to expect

No doubt you will be aware that the pandemic has brought some changes to the way many businesses operate. Mine is no exception and I have made the following changes to adhere to Scottish Government guidance:

• Arrive at the time of your appointment - no earlier please, because the waiting room is not to be used during the pandemic
• Wear a mask for the duration of the appointment
• Bring your own water
• Wash your hands on arrival (hand sanitiser and wash basins available)
• Maintain social distancing where possible when walking through the building
• The window will be kept open throughout the duration of the appointment. Whilst I do have some blankets, I do not have enough for everyone. If you are able to, please bring your own blanket if you fear you might get cold during the treatment.
• Consultations will be done online before the appointment - I will send you an email with a link for you to complete several days in advance of your appointment. I would also appreciate speaking to you on the phone within 24 hours of the appointment where possible to help us set a frame or intention for the session.
• Electronic payments are preferred - either by BACS or using contactless. Cash payments will be accepted if given to me in an envelope.
• I will follow up with you 7 days after your last appointment to check whether you or anyone in your household has developed coronavirus symptoms

IMPORTANT: If you develop coronavirus symptoms (a high temperature, a new cough, or experience a change or loss of your sense of smell or taste) before your appointment, please let me know. There will be no cancellation fee for missed or cancelled appointments due to the coronavirus. An up-to-date cancellation policy can be found here.

Please also note that Scottish Government advises that as of 1st August shielding is no longer mandatory for those deemed to be at high risk from coronavirus. I would therefore be willing to work with you when I re-open my practice, provided you are comfortable with doing so.

Thank you for taking the time to read all this. I appreciate it's a lot of information. If you have any questions feel free to get in touch. And if you're keen to book, click here.

And if you want to be kept up-to-date, please like my Facebook page or sign up to my enewsletter using the form at the bottom of this page.

I embarked on this project to explore the role of bodywork as a potential adjunct to existing methods used to integrate psychedelic experiences. The project involved working with volunteers who are using psychedelics for therapeutic reasons, to see how bodywork - and in my case I use a bodywork modality called Zero Balancing - could help them integrate their experiences. The three volunteers that came forward each wrote about their experiences and these can be read here (one, two and three).

I've been reflecting on this topic over the past few months, in part because I knew I wanted to continue it, or at the very least wrap it up with a summary. Quite where this blog post will sit in the scheme of this project remains to be seen. Regardless, it's a good opportunity to take stock.

Psychedelics (and I include MDMA in this category for the sake of ease due to its strong therapeutic potential) are becoming increasingly more widespread in therapeutic applications, with more and more research being funded to explore its uses in different areas of need. That's changed even in the 6 months since I embarked upon this project. And this is all due to the incredible potential they have, some of which I touched upon in the project's opening blog post. The results of these studies and the supporting data signal a seismic shift in the treatment of mental health disorders. This is nothing but good news, because the current pharmacological model for the treatment of mental health problems is inadequate.

Psychedelics enable an individual to step back from their every day perception of themselves and introduce a degree of neuroplasticity, freeing the individual up to the potential to change. To change their view or interpretation of events in their lives, and themselves. And notably for the better. Researchers suggest that the body's innate drive for homeostasis - its natural healing ability - is somehow able to come to the fore after the ingestion of these substances. So it's not only the promising results of the research that signals we may be in for a significant step forward in the treatment of mental health care, but there's a paradigm shift in what is viewed as the causative factor of healing. It's not the psychedelics themselves. It's the body's innate healing ability.

Take a moment to drink that in.

In a society where the blame is often put on some chemical imbalance or the genes you inherited or an allergen, we often seek to alter the chemical balance, combat the protein expression of the genes, or suppress the immune system. And that of course requires pharmaceuticals. Which are patented and sold for profit.

And along come psychedelics, which are often naturally occurring, unpatentable and sold with small profit margins. They've a long history of use for insight, creativity and healing. And it's as if modern society is just catching up and says, "Hey, these help the body to heal itself." And they are now rapidly close to becoming legally available for therapeutic purposes.

This, to me, is hugely exciting. Whether people are consciously aware of this or not, we are validating that our ancestors knew of this healing potential, that this healing potential was to be valued and, indeed, protected. We are validating that the body is capable of healing itself - by no means a new concept, but one that the profit driven industry has tried to obscure.

Alongside other shifts in the prevailing wisdom also increasingly supported by research - particularly trauma being stored in the body, and how one's social and life circumstances play a huge role in one's state of health - a more holistic view of wellbeing is once again coming to the fore. And potentially for the first time in modern or Western society. Socially and environmentally oriented policies therefore are not just a matter for socialists and environmentalists, but science backed and a matter of public health. And indeed global health.

If you can't tell already, the imminent emergence of psychedelic assisted psychotherapy gives me hope. Not just for the future of mental health treatment, but for the future of humanity and the planet.

But it's not the only thing that gives me hope. Bodywork and other somatic approaches for the treatment of trauma and mental health problems is another below-the-radar operation that is yet to have its heyday.

My personal experience of the therapeutic benefit of bodywork is what continues to drive my passion for this work. It has enabled me to come to terms with so many difficult parts of my past and continues to help me to embody and get in touch with my true self. And I think it's time in the limelight is due.

Yes, this is a personal crusade of sorts. To experience that someone's touch can alter your state of consciousness so you can access deep and forgotten memories is mind blowing. And that those memories can then be brought to awareness for processing, which in turn results in insights and physical healing is nothing short of profound. Healing the past to heal your body and mind is not something only bodywork can do. But it can do it.

So when I learnt that psychedelic integration was the challenging part for many who had therapeutic psychedelic experiences, I knew bodywork could help. For starters, we already help people to process all sorts of life experiences - grief, relationship problems, divorce, abuse, PTSD... you name it - so I did not doubt it was possible. Secondly, much of the difficulty with integration I heard or read about was to do with difficulty in grounding the insights and learnings from the psychedelic experience into their daily lives. What better way to ground experience than to work with the ground of our being, our physical body? You cannot manifest change in the world without enacting and expressing it into the world. And that can't be done without the use of your body.

Was there any success with those three volunteers?

Yes, absolutely. But not in the way that I, and perhaps they, had expected. Rather than simply grounding the psychedelic experience in their bodies, my perception was that the bodywork continued where the psychedelics left off.

Blockages highlighted by the psychedelics were removed. Good feelings of love and universality were amplified and allowed to move through. Stuck emotions hinted at during the psychedelic experience were released.

Looking purely at the initial outcomes and the catharsis experienced by the volunteers, these sessions were not different to sessions with clients who don't use psychedelics for therapeutic purposes. Just like the psychedelic compound itself is a facilitator of the body's own healing processes, so is therapeutic touch. The healing is always very unique to the individual, just as I imagine every psychedelic experience to be. But underneath all that we are all human. We all have grief, pain, joys, loves. And in that sense healing is also universal.

Whilst I had the idea that I, as a therapist, could connect in with the psychedelic experience and bring it into sync with the physical body, I was instead humbled - as working in this line of work often has the tendency to do - by the clients and what actually happened. This was a useful reminder that the therapist never dictates the healing. That is always for the client to do. And just like with psychedelics, the client don't always get what they want, but what they need.

It's clear from reading the accounts that all three volunteers received benefit from Zero Balancing. It helped them to deepen their understanding of their experiences - whether psychedelic or not - and enabled them to continue their personal development without the need for taking many hours out of their days to have a therapeutic psychedelic experience.

I have also learnt that having 3 sessions in relatively quick succession (a week apart for the first two volunteers, and 10 days apart for the third) provided a powerful therapeutic container for a deeper relationship to build between therapist and client, and this subsequently produced more profound and lasting effects. At least, that is my interpretation and experience. I have since utilised the 3 session model on other clients and that reinforced this understanding.

Volunteer #2's statement also really struck me: "I believe that Zero Balancing has helped me to rapidly integrate insights from Psychedelic therapy and provided me a way forward that otherwise may have taken months or years." Whilst this is what I aspired to when I started the project, I never thought I would read those words. And the impact of them is still sinking in.

Will I carry on with my personal crusade to place bodywork more into the spotlight?

Honestly, I do not know if that is my battle. I'd rather follow my passions and see what happens. Should that involve promoting this beautiful therapeutic art into the mainstream, only time will tell.

What I do know is that I am convinced that any psychedelic integration without a touch-based somatic approach is missing a powerful therapeutic ally. And that, I guess, is how I frame this. Bodywork is a powerful therapeutic modality in its own right, and an ally to all other therapeutic modalities. No one modality will heal the world of all its ills. Stronger together, stronger in collaboration. I therefore extend an open invitation to work with those in the psychedelic integration realm to explore this further. There is untouched (pun intended!) potential here.

For those of you who know me and have worked with me for some time, you will appreciate that I really miss connecting with my clients and working with my hands. You have all, without exception, been such a pleasure to work with.

To keep my love of this work alive and to nourish my creative side, I have been exploring something I call 'virtual Zero Balancing'.

What is virtual Zero Balancing?
Zero Balancing is a touch-based therapy and because I can't work with my hands during the lockdown, I am available to do this work via Zoom instead. Hence the name, virtual Zero Balancing!

The sessions will be verbal, rather than touch-based, and will have a similar structure to a regular ZB session (i.e. consultation, verbally guided ZB and time afterward to integrate).

How does this work?
In Zero Balancing we work with both the body's physical structure as well as its vitality, or energy. Whilst I can't work through touch during this time of social distancing, it's possible to work with the flow of vitality from a distance and through verbal guidance, enabling the client to reconnect with their body and help them work with whatever ails them physically, emotionally and/or spiritually. It is calming, balancing and can help you to feel more present and at home in yourself.

Sounds great! What do I need?
You'll need the following:

• A space where you won't be disturbed;
  
• A yoga mat, or something comfortable to lie on;
  
• A device with Zoom installed;
• A steady internet connection.
  

How much does it cost?
Virtual Zero Balancing sessions are available on a donation basis. Give whatever you want! If you're uncomfortable with that, then let me know. Funds can be transferred after the session via BACS.

How long is a virtual Zero Balancing session?
A session should take between 30 and 60 minutes.

If you have any further questions or would like to arrange a session, get in touch by email to contact@inner-flow.uk.

This is the last in a series of guest blog posts about psychedelic integration. See here for an introduction to this project, here for the first case study and here for the second case study.

It's hard to know where to start in summarising my experience of psychedelic-assisted therapy and Zero Balancing as, in James' words, 'the healing potential of psychedelics is so incredibly broad'. The reality of the healing experience, for me, was also incredibly broad. So much to consider!

I was both honoured and excited to have James invite me as a volunteer to help him with his exploration into how Zero Balancing might benefit the integration of psychedelic, or any plant, entheogenic or psychotropic healing experience. It felt, to me, like together we were doing something for the greater good.

I had two entheogenic healing experiences last year, the first MDMA, and the second ayahuasca. Both were held in a therapeutic and safe ceremonial space with either a psychotherapist or a shamanic practitioner guiding.

I'd been on an energy healing journey for about a year when it was suggested to me that I might be interested in trying MDMA. MDMA isn't a psychedelic, nor is it a plant, but due to its make up, and when used with care, respect and consideration, it has considerable healing potential. In research studies it has been achieving significant and long-term healing results for war veterans, freeing them from PTSD in one, two or a maximum of three treatments.

My own experience with MDMA was profound. So deeply profound, so devoid of ego and judgement, so beautiful and accepting of everybody and everything, that I didn't want to return 'here', to this every day state of consciousness. I saw (sensed) so much of my life, like a story, and gained a deep inner knowing, a true understanding, about why some things had happened the way they did and the reason for some pretty negative life-long belief systems and thought patterns.

My first session with James was a few weeks after that ceremony. I was aware that James spent quite a lot of time asking me just a few questions, but really listening to my answers, and letting me relive what I needed to relive of the experience. He then does a really wonderful job of summarising your story, which is a true skill, particularly when your story comes out as a kind of mish-mash, and reflecting it back to you, allowing you to see it more clearly and any links or relevant connections you might have missed. He then asks you what your intent is for this particular healing session.

The treatment is very soothing, very relaxing, very calming, with maybe an occasional subtle feeling somewhere that James might just have hit on something, but no pain, no discomfort, just ease and surrender. As he goes about his work, I found I gradually felt very settled, my breathing slowed down significantly, and as is usual for me, I released and shifted energy blocks through very deep breaths and yawns. After my first session, I felt very light in weight, very slow, a bit low on energy, a bit spacey, but like a beacon of bright light walking through Edinburgh, and although I don't like cities, I was calm and unflappable, even in the chaos around the town. An important thing James had said at the end of the session was that 'it starts here'. I wasn't to make any preconceived notions or judgements about what I felt or didn't feel. I was just to allow and observe.

Between my first and second Zero Balancing session, I participated in an ayahuasca healing ceremony. It was a bit like the spirit of that ceremony, the 'mother', knew what had happened at my first ceremony and gave me 'part 2', or the next stage, of my healing journey. Everything was consistent and related to the experience I'd had with MDMA. James wasn't surprised there was consistency, he said that once you've opened up your energy to the extent that I had, the connections in spirit, in plants and across everything are finally able to properly reconnect and that's when you really start to reach the truth.

The session was the same structure, with a very fulfilling chat first. I noticed one of the other volunteers described James as a calm still pond, that he had no ripples converging with her ripples, there was no muddy pond of information or emotion, she knew everything was hers. And that's exactly what it's like with James. The benefit of that initial chat is absolutely significant. He creates true, personal, loving space, holding you in such a revered place of dignity and respect that that alone, I found to be incredibly healing. It's a rare and beautifully nurturing quality.

I felt more energised after the second session than I had after the first. When James finished the treatment, I was lying on the bed feeling like a vibration. Like I was just energy - which I am - but I had no feeling of a body mass or density, it felt like I was just aura, fractal patterns and frequency.

James offered that he felt I was much more present and grounded during this session than I had been at my first. At my first he'd felt I was a bit up in the clouds (these might be my words), and totally not grounded. This actually made sense to me, having really felt the integration experience subtly taking place in my life (with and without my assistance) and me stepping up and out into things I never would have before.

Again, James had asked me what my intention was for the session, and this time I surmised that it was to help me naturally adapt to the complete change of direction my life seemed to be taking as a result of my introduction to psychedelic therapy and Zero Balancing.

The day of my third and final session sadly arrived (each of my three sessions were ten days apart), and I described to James a seething anger I had experienced, and heavy flatness for a couple of days preceding the final session. We talked through that. My anger wasn't a rage and throw-things-around anger, it was a deep, emotional, raw pain that produced hard tears which, on hindsight, I think were a lot related to both clarity and confusion.

The psychedelics took me to my expanded consciousness, they took me to a place of deep truth that was profoundly and authentically me. By the time my angry day came, I'd spent weeks consciously integrating this 'loving authentic me' and these new 'knowings' about myself, as best as I could into my life and the reality of our world. I'd been being aware, becoming enlightened and realising a new perspective, realising that my now broader, more conscious awareness could see the world, the system that we live in, even better than I used to be able to see it - and oh my goodness, it was scarier than ever. I also got angry because I'd seen my life, felt my life, been guided in my life from a place of absolute and pure acceptance and unconditional love, and here I was, these few weeks on, feeling as much in my ego as I'd ever been. I felt that even having been prepared for it, known the significance of it, I'd been naive about how the integration of my two experiences into everyday life would work. At first it had been so easy. Then it got harder, I had to be more conscious, I could feel the spirit, the beauty, the ease leaving me, but as it left me it didn't take with it the memory or the feeling of being in that place, being that person, and I got angry at how hard it was to naturally create - or even unnaturally, with a lot of effort, create - that authentic person and that truth in our thick and heavy third-dimensional existence. I got angry because I could and can now see the extent of the hideousness in the world and I find the enormity of that hideousness scarier than I ever did. Before, I couldn't really see it or understand it properly. I still don't, but I do know not to trust it and that I have to rise far above it, shine that beacon of light I felt after session one, and help others to do the same. Yet having experienced the truth of love at the highest frequency, it pains me to be able to use that experience only as my learning ground.

Anyway, James helped me to validate and accept these feelings as a huge part of the integration process, also suggesting that they were showing me something about myself that I either no longer needed, or that was giving me a message in some way. This third session was, for me, the most significant. Perhaps by this time there was something soothing in the familiarity. In the third session, as James released some dense energy in my chest, my right hand felt like it went numb and I got the sense of a black splot of tar moving out of the front of my body. James then gave my right arm and hand some attention, the numbness changed to pins and needles and then as the session continued my hand was very cold. James told me after the session that he felt we'd reconnected my head and my heart, and he also gave me a message about my expectations of love which, later on when I had the chance to process the message, made so much sense and which I went on to discuss with my partner. This was a new understanding, something that hadn't come up anywhere in my life until now, and it explained to me a lot about how my emotions had been recently, and perhaps for quite some time. I felt very tired after this session, but so very grateful to have had the opportunity to meet James and become a little bit more whole from these sessions.

Yet where does integration end? Does it end? As I continue into a new year, the onslaught of new ideas, awareness, recognition of myself and wow moments continue as a conscious unfolding into the every day. My summary, I feel, would be portrayed well in a graph where we started on, say, 5, traveling along in life at 5. Then after psychedelic medicine we go up, wow, maybe to 8 or 9, yes, life is good, life is different, wow. Then take a nose-dive down to 2 or 3, where life's a bit hard again, harder than it was 'before', these were my angry, down days, and then eventually you settle into something that's around 6 or 7. I really do believe that if you focus on the integration, your level of consciousness is going to expand, and your energy 'constancy' is going to rise. Zero Balancing doesn't do it for you, you must be the leader, but it most definitely helps in a number of ways.

Initially I expected that Zero Balancing was just a hands-on energy-healing treatment (maybe it is with other practitioners, I don't know) but with James it's so much more. It wasn't till after I'd finished the series of three sessions that I realised the significance of that initial focused chat. It's like you get 2-for-1, a mentor as well as an energy healer. For me now, I see the session as being a conglomeration of two parts: part one the coaching, part two the treatment. First of all James listens, asks and validates, summarises and then doesn't so much link this information to the treatment but uses his absorption of this knowledge to allow a better 'whole', a 'wholer whole', as he invites back the flow of energy through the energies and joints.

I enjoyed the trio of sessions too. It was like you were involved in something, committed to something, like you had something to check back on and follow through on, to check progress on, at each session. Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU for the honour and opportunity to participate James. You've not seen the last of me!

PS: I mentioned above that I'd ventured into new and unknown territory as a result of taking psychedelics. This new and unknown is related to something that happened in both my MDMA and my ayahuasca ceremonies. It was the resounding call for me to get my mask off and share my truth. To cut a long story short, I was drawn by the spirit of consciousness to sign up with and volunteer with an exciting new global movement called #ThankYouPlantMedicine so that I can share truth to a world that is in badly need of the truth. ThankYouPlantMedicine is a gratitude campaign that's calling for 100,000+ people to tell their healing or transformation story on 20 February 2020, the intent being that the stigma and discrimination behind the use of these healing medicines can be dissolved. If you're interested in finding out more or joining in, there's more information here. Thank you James, for allowing me to share that here:

• Website https://thankyouplantmedicine.com/
• FB Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/TYPMCommunity/
• And our wee Scotland tribe page that is slowly growing in likes
  https://www.facebook.com/ThankYouPlantMedicineScotland/